There’s A Conspiracy Theory That Louis Tomlinson’s Baby Is Fake
I love a good conspiracy theory, but this one is about as odd as they get.
Louis Tomlinson became a father to Freddie in January. ‘Congratulations’, most of us normal folk said, ‘he’ll make a great dad.’ etc. etc.
A photo posted by Louis Tomlinson (@louist91) on Feb 19, 2016 at 2:17pm PST
Well, us normal folk have no idea what is going on. Like considerate parents would, Louis and the babys mother, Briana Jungwirth, have kept Freddie largely hidden from the ever curiouspublic eye and have shared only a handful of images of him.
Take a deep breath – we’re not entering into the murky waters of deep and bizarre conspiracy theories.
The new theory is known as “Babygate” and it links back to another ongoingconspiracy, which suggests that Louis is in a relationship with Harry Styles. This sordid affair can be traced back to May 12th, when a Twitter account called @BrianaFactswas started. Briana wasn’t very well known at the time, and was yet to be acknowledged as knowing Louis at all. Yet a mere two days later Louis and Briana were pictured together for the first time.
This begs the serious, serious, serious question, who would start a fan page dedicated to an unknown girl called Briana? His management of course, laying the foundations for their grand plan.
Louis, who knows the best way to con the world is to throw out clues as you go along, was seen throwing a toy doll off the stage, saying “it’s not real.” It’s a clue that most of us useless, casual observers would never have spotted. But it was there all along, right in front of our eyes.
Briana’s pregnancy was confirmed only two months after the two were seen together for the first time, a whole month before the 12 week “safe” period that most people normally wait for. Was this just keennesson the happy couple’s part? Of course not, it was those trigger happy conspirators being too eager to get their message out.
The Baby Is Born
It may look like a happy father letting the world know how happy he is.But hidden in there is a vital clue. Now check out his other tweets from around that time.
Someone noticed something…This clearly wasn’t Louis tweeting.
I know you have probably made up your mind by now, and are certain that Louis is nothing but a lying father of nobody, but just wait until you see this piece of ghastly evidence.
Louis’ tweet implies that the baby was born on January 22nd, whereas Briana’s Instagram post suggests the 21st. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET THE DATE RIGHT.
And then there’s the photos. The most talented investigators of the internet have been analysing Briana’s photos, and have come to the conclusion that they aren’t genuine. And what this? Eh? My god, a defense lawyer would choke on his coffee at seeing such irrefutable evidence.
Any why on earth was he posting pictures of the baby in black and white? Because it is easier to distort, obviously.
Meet my little lad, Freddie A photo posted by Louis Tomlinson (@louist91) on Jan 27, 2016 at 7:54pm PST
A clever Tumblr user explains why this photo is clearly a fake.
This seals it. The photo on the right was taken when the baby was born. The photo on the left, which is Louis with his by now blatantly fake baby,shows him with much longer hair. As louisstopsf**kers so eloquently puts it, “who’s hair grows that fast.”
This next piece of evidence is soconvincing it’s basically DNA. Tattoos don’t just disappear like that pal.
There’s more stuff proving that the baby is a doll, that his eyes are always closed for a reason. You know the kind of evidence we’re talking about, it’s watertight stuff.
In a desperate attempt to stop the truth from getting out, Louis posted another pic of Freddie yesterday. You ain’t fooling me mate. LOOK AT THE BALL. NO KID OF THAT AGE HAS CLOSE CONTROL LIKE THAT. AND THAT TRAINER IN THE TOP LEFT CORNER. I’VE SEEN IT BEFORE, WHEN I WAS VISITING THE MUSEUM OF PHOTOSHPOPPING LEGENDS. HE WORKS ON RECEPTION. YOU…YOU…
Seriously though, imagine being Louis Tomlinson and having to put up with this s**t.